Chapter 6: Becoming Lovers?

A faint breeze drifted in through the slightly ajar door, cooling the flush on Gu Xinyao’s face.

The hurried pace with which she had run into the living room slowed. As she calmed down, a wave of annoyance at her own clumsiness washed over her. It seemed that every time she was in his presence, she lost her composure. She felt like a little girl, awkward and flustered in front of the boy she liked—not only becoming a laughingstock but also failing to be taken seriously.

She covered her face with her hands, remaining still for a long time. The medical kit left on the floor served as a silent testament to her foolishness.

She shook her head to cast off the tightness in her chest and tried to relax. Running her fingers through her messy, bird’s-nest hair, she offered a bitter smile. He had already made himself so clear; why was she still nursing such delusional hopes?

Exhaling a long, weary breath, she patted her cheeks to wake herself up. She bent down to pick up the medical kit, navigated around the coffee table, and opened the wardrobe to return the kit to its usual spot.

As she straightened up, her head bumped into a collection of hanging clothes—garments she had designed herself during bouts of boredom. While they were hardly sophisticated, they had the merit of being comfortable and casual. In this world, people seemed to look down on cotton, favoring gauze, satin, or silk. While those fabrics might be comfortable to some, she found them stifling, as if she were trapped in a shell.

Touching the fabric, she couldn't help but think of Dugu Yi and his injuries. She sighed softly, deciding to treat it as a debt from a past life that she was meant to repay in this one. She unhooked a few sets of clothes. He might not be willing to wear them, but they were the only things that wouldn't aggravate his wounds.

When she returned to the room with the clothes, Dugu Yi was in the middle of dressing. He clearly hadn't expected her back so soon; the briefs in his hand were only pulled up to his knees.

"Ahem! Well, I don't think you should wear those; they’ll be too tight. Wear these instead; they'll be more comfortable." Gu Xinyao froze for a second, then quickly turned her head away, her face flushing as she spoke in a stiff, guarded tone while holding up the cotton garments.

Dugu Yi felt uneasy, his heart still fluttering from the earlier intimacy. He had already dismissed his initial thought of resting longer, hoping to dress quickly and leave while she was gone. He hadn't expected her to return so abruptly. Now, he was caught in an awkward position—he couldn't very well continue dressing, nor could he take them off.

Looking at the clothes in her hands, a warmth spread through him. He rarely wore cotton. At home, his mother demanded he maintain a dignified and noble image at all times, and honestly, he rarely had the leisure to wear anything so casual.

"No, thank you," he said after a moment, politely declining her offer.

Gu Xinyao turned back to face him, her expression shifting into something akin to irritation. She wasn't angry at his refusal, but rather at his stubbornness. His injury needed proper care; wearing such tight trousers would only worsen the condition. Did he have no regard for his own well-being? Was it for Duanmu Feng, or someone else entirely?

Driven by this thought, she forgot her embarrassment, ignoring the internal alarm bells warning her that this was inappropriate.

She strode to the bedside and, without ceremony, pulled down the briefs he hadn't finished putting on. Dugu Yi seemed stunned by her boldness, momentarily paralyzed, just staring at her blankly.

Without looking at him, she slid the cotton trousers over his feet. Then, moving to his side, she commanded, "Lift up."

Had anyone else been there, they would have been baffled, but Dugu Yi instinctively obeyed. Gu Xinyao swiftly pulled the trousers up, leaving him no time to think.

By the time Dugu Yi realized what had happened, he was wearing the white, floral-patterned cotton trousers. They were loose, with an extra-padded section in the crotch that perfectly protected his injured area. The only flaw was that they were a bit short, ending at his shins like cropped pants.

Next came the cotton shirt, which was button-up. As her fingers brushed against his chest, she felt her calm heart skip a beat, and her earlier anger dissipated like a popped balloon.

His chest muscles were smooth and firm, and the tooth mark above his left nipple was her own handiwork from the previous night. Touching it reminded her of how wild and uninhibited she had been.

As she buttoned his shirt, she realized how crude her actions had been. She had lost all self-control. She had never considered herself an impulsive person, yet whenever she was with him, she ceased to be herself.

***

His influence on her was far too great. If they couldn't be lovers, it would be best they didn't become enemies, for she couldn't guarantee she wouldn't surrender to his charm.

"I, um... I didn't mean to be... so rude." She spoke hesitantly, as if she were the one who had been bullied. She dared not look up, fixing her gaze instead on his bare feet. He was beautiful, and every part of him was exquisite; his toes were neatly trimmed, round, and clear, and the tops of his feet were unnaturally pale from a lack of sun.

She blinked, suddenly realizing she sounded like a fetishist, staring so intently at his feet. She reminded herself that this was no time to indulge in his beauty; she had to regain her composure. But when people are nervous, no amount of self-reminding helps, and her words remained clumsy.

...

She waited for a long time, but he didn't answer. She assumed he must be truly angry; no man would be happy being treated like that, even if her actions were born of concern. She didn't know what to do. Having never been in a relationship, being trapped in a room with a man she admired had become her most difficult challenge.

Dugu Yi, who had been handled like a puppet on the bed, wasn't as angry as she imagined. He simply felt a sense of helplessness, mixed with an indescribable feeling stirring in his heart. She explained herself while keeping her head down, and he didn't know how to respond. Since last night, they could no longer communicate or treat each other in any normal way.

He had always been decisive in his own affairs, but this time, he wanted to be firm, yet the person before him left him at a loss, unable to act.

"I'll take you back. Don't worry, it's only six in the morning; your family shouldn't be awake yet." Gu Xinyao couldn't bear the silence any longer. If he couldn't forgive her rudeness, the best she could do was take him home. Perhaps he would feel better away from her place.

Gu Xinyao was a woman of action in some respects. Without looking at Dugu Yi, she unilaterally decided on a course of action and began.

She folded the clothes he had discarded, put them in a reusable bag, and hung it over her arm. She prepared to put his socks and shoes on so she could take him home.

"Wait!" Dugu Yi pressed his hand over hers to stop her. He had never been served like this. Perhaps he came from a noble background, but he had never been the person his mother expected him to be. Since he could take care of himself, he had handled everything on his own—from his daily needs to his personal affairs.

Gu Xinyao looked up, puzzled. His hand was slightly cool—a matter of constitution, she figured.

Dugu Yi looked at her face. She was young, and objectively beautiful, though perhaps not as refined or capable as Duanmu Feng, nor did she have a background as impressive. Yet, for some reason, in the limited clarity of last night, he had chosen her as his first woman.

"I will not get married," he said, his eyes reflecting a deep longing.

Hm? Gu Xinyao didn't understand his meaning. Was he telling her that he wouldn't marry someone like her?

"I won't marry, but I... I can have a lover." Seeing she didn't grasp his intent, he continued, his tone tense and hurried. Yes, he didn't want to marry and never would. He didn't want to rely on a woman, didn't want to be told what he could or couldn't do, and didn't want to lose his dignity as a man.

But he wasn't opposed to having a lover. Before, he never would have entertained such a thought. Generally speaking, women—especially unmarried ones—wouldn't want to be a man's mistress. But now, after all she had done for him, he felt that if they couldn't marry, they could be lovers. As long as she was willing, he didn't care about status or background; he was even willing to provide for her, provided she gave him the dignity and freedom he required.

After listening to him, Gu Xinyao was stunned for a few seconds. Then, her calm expression was slowly replaced by suppressed anger.

She would not be his mistress. Even in her own time, she had never considered being anyone's lover, nor having such a relationship. In this world, she was even less inclined. She knew what being a mistress meant—a status cut off from happiness, unable to be seen in the light of day, unable to walk side-by-side with the person she loved.

"No! I will not be your mistress, and I will not be anyone's mistress." She looked at him, her eyes burning with a firm, radiant light and a hint of fury. If he thought she was a woman to be looked down upon, he was mistaken.

Dugu Yi trembled at her words. He looked away, his long lashes fluttering as he withdrew his hand from hers and gripped the bedsheets instead. He knew how preposterous his suggestion had been. Any woman with self-respect would refuse. He could see she wasn't the type to depend on others, yet he had still made that selfish request. He really had been a fool.

***

"I do like you, but I am not willing to be anyone's mistress, including yours. I used to despise women who destroyed other people's families. They did wrong and then claimed it was for the sake of love—that kind of relationship is fundamentally wrong." After she finished, she regretted it. She was acting like a moralist, lecturing him. Not wanting to see his mocking gaze, she lowered her head and finished the work she had been interrupted in, putting on his socks and then his shoes.

Dugu Yi remained stiff at her words. After Gu Xinyao helped him into his outer coat, she pulled his arm over her shoulder to carry him on her back. Perhaps struck by what she had said, Dugu Yi didn't resist; he lay limply on her back, silent and tense.

Just as Gu Xinyao reached the living room door, it opened from the outside.

Ge Yue entered first and came face-to-face with Gu Xinyao, startled to see her carrying someone on her back.

The woman behind him, annoyed by his sudden stop, complained, "Honey, why did you stop? Didn't you say we were coming back to sleep?" Her voice sounded thick with sleep.

"A-Yao, are you going out?" Ge Yue asked, though his eyes kept darting to the person on her back.

"Ah! My friend drank too much last night and hasn't sobered up yet. I'm taking him home." Gu Xinyao felt tense running into Ge Yue and Qin Rou, her demeanor becoming increasingly unnatural.

Friend? Ge Yue looked at her strangely. If he recalled correctly, in the months she had lived here, she had stayed in the shop and rarely gone out. How had she met a friend?

"Hey, honey, A-Yao said she's taking a friend home. You're blocking the door and not letting her out; that's a bit bossy, don't you think?" Qin Rou complained from behind. They were a truly loving couple, though they had their little frictions.

Ge Yue wanted to ask more, but Qin Rou had already moved him aside—or rather, she hugged him and ushered him inside.

When Qin Rou caught a glimpse of Dugu Yi’s face, her eyes widened. She rubbed them, as if in disbelief. Once she confirmed who it was, her mouth hung open, and she couldn't find her voice.

Gu Xinyao knew how dangerously curious they were. She didn't want them to embarrass Dugu Yi, even if what he had said earlier had made her angry. She couldn't bear to see him troubled.

She hurried out past Qin Rou and Ge Yue, calling out over her shoulder, "I'll be back later!"

Once she was gone, Qin Rou finally found her voice and shouted, "Dugu Yi!" But they were already far away.

"Do you believe that guy was just drunk?" Qin Rou asked Ge Yue, staring at the door, reluctant to let such a beautiful man slip away.

Seeing Qin Rou still lingering on the thought of Dugu Yi—unable to tear her eyes away from such a handsome man—Ge Yue felt a spark of jealousy. "My eyes aren't blind; of course I can see they're together. Look at the clothes that Dugu Yi is wearing; they were clearly made by A-Yao. Everyone calls him an iceberg, but I think he’s a volcano buried underground, ready to ignite at the first spark. A-Yao is truly blind to look at a man like that. You! Stop looking and get inside."

With that, Ge Yue pinched Qin Rou's ear and dragged her into their own quarters. Their home was a large six-room unit, with two rooms given to Gu Xinyao and four for themselves. Except for the main entrance, the living rooms and bedrooms were separate, like two distinct households.

Now, Ge Yue was dragging Qin Rou into his own four rooms.