Chapter 13: The Happiness We Yearn For

Most hospitals in the ideal country were private clinics, with very few state-owned facilities. This prevalence of private clinics heightened competition, which naturally benefited the public in no small measure.

Gu Xinyao, enduring a slight discomfort in her stomach, took the clinic address given by Qin Rou and boarded the magic electric light rail to the destination. Upon disembarking, she realized that this clinic was far from a large medical institution.

Perhaps due to its discreet location, there were not many patients inside. Upon entering, the receptionist greeted her warmly. After registering, it wasn’t long before it was her turn.

The doctor's office was located to the left side of the consultation hall, just around a corridor.

Following the signs on the wall, Gu Xinyao walked down the corridor. Just as she neared the doctor’s room, she unexpectedly ran into Du Gu Yi.

Had she not known him, she might have walked past without a second glance. After more than ten days, he looked thinner and more haggard. His large black sunglasses covered most of his face but could not mask the exhaustion etched there. Today, his attire was quite ordinary, but his bearing could not be concealed by his simple clothes. After exchanging a glance with Gu Xinyao, he stopped in his tracks.

“Hello,” he greeted softly. Gu Xinyao was taken aback, feeling unexpectedly flattered. She had assumed that after his cold demeanor before, he would pretend not to know her upon meeting again, but instead, he took the initiative to say hello.

“Are you… sick?” She noticed the test report in his hand and wondered why he would be here. Nobles usually had private doctors, so it seemed odd for him to visit such a small clinic.

Under her gaze, Du Gu Yi suddenly remembered the report in his hand. He put it into his pocket and smiled faintly, “Yeah, it’s nothing serious, just a minor ailment.”

Gu Xinyao blinked, then shifted her gaze back to his face. Behind those sunglasses, she could not discern any change in his eyes and was unsure whether his words were true or not.

“Are you not feeling well too?” Du Gu Yi guessed that since they met here, she must be here for treatment as well. Despite knowing it might be inappropriate, he asked anyway.

“Yeah, I’ve been feeling nauseous and bloated in my stomach these past two days. You…” Gu Xinyao didn’t think stomach problems were a big deal. She had suffered from gastritis before and it was always cured with medicine. This time, however, the medication seemed ineffective, which made Qin Rou and her husband worry, so she came to the clinic for a check-up. Suddenly recalling that he had been taken home by his family, she wondered why no one was accompanying him now. Then she thought better of it, deciding it was none of her business, and after uttering “you,” she didn’t know how to continue.

Behind his sunglasses, Du Gu Yi’s eyes suddenly widened and scanned her briefly—something Gu Xinyao could not perceive.

“How have you been these days? The reporters haven’t bothered you again, have they? I heard someone was trying to scheme against you and Duan Mu Feng. Perhaps investigating from this angle might be easier.” Gu Xinyao did not want to tell him that she had already looked into Li Wu; some things she preferred to handle on her own and saw no need to involve him.

“I’m fine. Besides feeling bloated and nauseous, do you have any other symptoms?” Du Gu Yi’s tone was somewhat unsteady, as if he wanted to find out more.

Gu Xinyao was puzzled by his question and looked at him curiously. His expression didn’t change much, though behind the sunglasses, she couldn’t tell.

“No, just nausea, vomiting, bloating. Probably just a relapse of my gastritis,” she shook her head. Why were they all so tense?

Du Gu Yi nodded, instinctively feeling for the pocket holding the test report, then said, “Alright, I won’t keep you from your appointment. Goodbye!”

Gu Xinyao didn’t really want to say goodbye so soon but didn’t know what else to say, so she nodded and returned the farewell.

After a few steps, she suddenly stopped and turned to look back, but Du Gu Yi had already turned the corner and was out of sight. A vague thought stirred in her mind.

Turning back, she went into the doctor’s consultation room.

The doctor was a middle-aged man seated behind the desk, sorting through some test reports. Seeing Gu Xinyao enter, he raised his hand and gestured to the chair opposite, “Please sit.”

Gu Xinyao obeyed and sat down. Before the doctor could speak, she asked, “Doctor, that person, Du Gu Yi, is my friend. I accompanied him here. What illness does he have?”

The doctor looked up at her but did not answer immediately.

After a moment, he asked, “Are you two a couple?”

Gu Xinyao was taken aback. She hadn’t expected such a question and answered hesitantly, feeling a trace of guilt. Yet her urgent desire to know about Du Gu Yi’s condition suppressed that guilt.

“Well, he’s been feeling unwell recently and came for a check-up. Initially, we suspected he might be pregnant, but tests showed otherwise. Some symptoms were psychosomatic, caused by excessive worry. With rest and relaxation, he should recover.” The doctor placed Du Gu Yi’s file on the desk and pointed to several indicators as he spoke.

Hearing this, Gu Xinyao felt a complex mix of emotions—happy at times, yet also disappointed. She didn’t know whether she wished he was pregnant or not. In short, her feelings were complicated.

After the doctor finished, he no longer engaged with Gu Xinyao, who remained lost in thought, silent.

Several minutes later, noticing she had not left, the doctor asked, “Is there anything else I can help you with?”

Only then did Gu Xinyao remember she had come for her own treatment but had been distracted by Du Gu Yi.

“Well, doctor, I’ve also been feeling unwell lately—nausea, vomiting, bloating.”

The doctor considered for a moment, then stood and said, “Please come to the examination bed. I’ll conduct a check-up.”

Gu Xinyao followed, somewhat puzzled. She didn’t understand why a stomach ailment required lying on the examination bed. Shouldn’t the doctor have ordered a gastroscopy or some other test?

The doctor swiftly pulled out a compact diagnostic device beside the bed.

Lying down, Gu Xinyao’s eyes fixated on the miniature instrument. She marveled at how, in this era, such a tiny device could perform a medical examination.

The doctor attached two small probes to her forearms and affixed a warm patch-like sensor to her abdomen. Being handled by a male doctor in this way made her slightly embarrassed. Since her parents passed away, she rarely went to hospitals. Fortunately, fate had been kind to her—she seldom fell ill in that time.

After about three or four minutes, the doctor stopped all the devices.

Gu Xinyao sat back at the desk as the doctor returned holding the report generated by the instrument. She noticed his brows were furrowed, and his expression somewhat unusual.

“You’re not from this country, are you?” he asked after a moment of contemplation, his words almost startling Gu Xinyao.

She didn’t know how he knew but couldn’t deny it.

“Yes, I’m from Country C. I’ve been here for almost a year.”

The doctor’s frown eased slightly, though a crease remained between his thick black eyebrows.

“In your previous work, did you often come into contact with radioactive materials? For example, uranium.”

Gu Xinyao thought back. She was an electrical engineer and had never handled uranium or similar substances. What did this have to do with her work?

“No, I’m certain I never worked with radioactive substances,” she said, shaking her head to dismiss the doctor’s suspicion.

The doctor reviewed the report again, his brow furrowing once more. He spoke quietly, “Our country has made great efforts to eliminate radioactive materials. Nowadays, practically none remain, and organic substitutes are used in tests. As for other countries, you say you never worked with radioactive substances, yet I have detected traces of radiation on your body. Because these radioactive materials have caused some damage to your body, I must responsibly inform you of something. Your symptoms resembling pregnancy are not due to actual pregnancy but are caused by radiation exposure. From now on, you will not be able to conceive—not only can you not become pregnant, but you also cannot impregnate your partner.”

Every word he spoke was measured carefully, as if doing so might soften the blow of such devastating news.

Gu Xinyao listened intently. When she heard the last sentence, she felt as if she were sitting in a snowfield, chilled to the bone, her limbs numb.

“I… I can’t…” Each word she uttered felt like a thousand-pound weight. If not for the small shred of reason she still clung to, she might have collapsed to the ground right then.

“I know this news is a shock to anyone. However, society has become more open-minded. You can adopt a child, or you may consider in vitro fertilization with assistance. The technology today is very advanced, painless, and highly effective.” The doctor knew such news was a huge blow to patients, but as a physician, he had seen many cases. While some couples chose to divorce, more often they sought external help, which was nothing unusual.

Gu Xinyao’s lips stiffened, unable to respond. Perhaps the doctor was right, but the thought of her partner having a child with someone else weighed heavily on her heart and refused to ease.

Moreover, she had so longed for a child of her own. The doctor’s revelation that radiation exposure had robbed her of fertility was a terrifying reality. What of the happiness she had dreamed of? Could she still attain it? Her thoughts spiraled into a tormenting loop, until her arm was suddenly pulled upward.

“Thank you, doctor!” Du Gu Yi had quietly returned. He entered silently, thanked the doctor, and then took Gu Xinyao by the hand.

“Let’s go!” he said, pulling her toward the exit. Gu Xinyao’s mind remained fixated on the doctor’s words, following Du Gu Yi mechanically, unaware of where they were headed.